… and I’m celebrating it!
They’re not the sleek black lycra form-fitting variety – all about looks – that I normally wear.
These are loose black cotton no-name shorts with a drawstring at the waist – designed for pure comfort. Ahhh …
I didn’t dare buy unflattering shorts before or I’d hear: “What’s up with you! You need to pull in your belly!” “What will others think of you if you wear those … yuck!”
Those voices in my head developed in me some time ago to protect me when I didn’t feel completely accepted just as I was. The thought was, if only this was “just right” about me – like a flat belly – then I’d be accepted.
Over time I’ve listened to these old beliefs with an empathic ear and grieved – with sweet tears – the loss of pure and unconditional acceptance of myself.
It’s not that I’m completely healed and free of those voices representing my old hurts. I’m just free enough to buy a pair of unflattering shorts.
And it feels good to accept my own self more and more unconditionally. Being true to myself.
I have a sense of inner peace and relaxation and even a sense of playfulness about it.
When my teenage son saw me wearing the unflattering shorts, he told me to change right away and to throw them away. I responded, “I promise to only wear them in dark alleys.” 🙂
Do you long for unconditional self-acceptance too? What is it that you’d really like to do that the voices in your head keep you from doing?
In peace and love, Teresa
