Today is the 30th consecutive weekly blog post I’ve written! Woohoo! Woohoo!!
When I began writing, I didn’t really know why. What I knew was that I kept sensing from within, “Write, write, write, …”
I don’t hear my inner voice without also hearing a choir of voices “protecting” me from doing anything that might risk rejection.
- · “No one will read what you have to say.”
- · “Writing a piece once a week … that’s a lot; you can’t do that.”
- · “You’re not a writer. Why would you write?”
These voices have a history. When people weren’t there for me and I was hurt, I made meaning about myself in the ways you hear in the voices. Can you hear it in this comment? “No one will read what you have to say.” It’s scaring me into not writing for fear of rejection.
These old stories have had the effect of stopping me from taking risks. They’re trying to keep me safe by protecting me from uncertainty and the possibility of being hurt again.
This time the voice beckoning me to write was stronger than the voices of protection and discouragement.
It’s not that writing these 30 blog posts hasn’t been a bumpy road. The voices are there for a very important reason – for my protection from hurt. And, it’s been an opportunity to get to know them and their stories even more intimately. And as I know them – give them the attention and sweet empathy they long for – I understand their origins, and they begin to lose their power over me.
Now when risky, uncertain situations arise, it feels like there’s a fork in the road. I sense my heart’s desire, and I hear my protector voices. And, I’m freer to choose.
I love the way Rumi put it, “This being human is a guest house. Every morning a new arrival. A joy, a depression, a meanness, some momentary awareness comes as an unexpected visitor. Welcome and entertain them all! Even if they’re a crowd of sorrows, who violently sweep your house empty of its furniture. Still, treat each guest honorably. He may be clearing you out for some new delight.”
How would it be to welcome and entertain every “unexpected visitor” in your life?
In peace and love, Teresa
P.S. I’m excited to share with you that my blog posts are now appearing on San Mateo Patch! If you’re willing, I’d love for you to share this news with your friends. 🙂