Before Thanksgiving you may remember I asked my friends to celebrate me at an early birthday. I continued the theme and requested the same from my family on my birthday – which happened on Thanksgiving day this year.
When family emails about our Thanksgiving day plans were going around I asked to hear from everyone what they appreciated about me on my Thanksgiving birthday. No one responded to my email request.
Of course, there’s loads of room in there for my protective voices to fill up the space. “No one will have anything to say.” “I’ve asked too much.” Those voices “protect” me by making me bad for asking, rather than facing the far worse feelings of rejection, that my family might not be there for me – to be alone. The truth is that I really didn’t know what they were thinking or feeling.
After dinner I noticed my brother adjusting some electronics. Before I knew it, my daughter and her husband were skyped in and projected onto the family room wall. And all of the other family members were sitting in a circle with me.
I was SO surprised to have the family gathering to celebrate me!!!
I was so moved by their love. I started to cry and continued to cry through each person coming over to me, holding my hands, and telling how they love me.
At the end, my sister-in-law Kendra said with a glowing smile, “You’re well-loved, Teresa.”
What a super memorable occasion! The best birthday gift ever! I’m so glad I didn’t wait until they said it – hopefully in some far away future time 🙂 – at a memorial service for me.
This experience reminds me of a quote by the Sufi poet Hafiz:
“Admit something: Everyone you see, you say to them, ‘Love me.’
Of course you do not do this out loud, otherwise someone would call the cops.
Still though, think about this, this great pull in us to connect. Why not become the one who lives with a full moon in each eye that is always saying, with that sweet moon language, what every other eye in this world is dying to hear?”
How would it be to ask your special ones to tell you how they love you now? I’m sure they won’t call the cops! … and how sweet to be filled with their love and a full moon in each eye.
In peace and love, Teresa